The Good, The Bad, The Erap

Yesterday, millions of Filipinos exercised their right to vote, but there is a great majority who shouldn’t even be allowed to step into the voting area. I, myself, did not vote because I knew that it would be useless to stand against the masses of uneducated voters that encompasses the Filipino nation.
First: Nancy Binay is a senator. Why in the world would anyone who is even the closest bit to literate vote for Nancy Binay? Because ‘Binay’. Her father, Vice President of the Philippines, Jejomar Binay, has done an amazing job in his past job as the mayor of Makati City. He made the city flourish, which is why we have Makati City as the business capital of the Philippines. She doesn’t even have a background in politics other than her family. She graduated college at the mighty young age of 24 with, yes, a degree in Tourism. She couldn’t even get a damn job. Her father had to hire her as his secretary just so that she could be employed. She’s also married, but still uses the surname of his father. What does that say of her? Incompentence.
Second: people who should win didn’t, and people who shouldn’t win did. People like Nancy Binay, and oh my God ERAP (but that’s for later). Grace Poe, too, but she did admit that her surname was her biggest plus, and she’s proven herself worthy so far. Risa Hontiveros isn’t even close to winning, last I checked. People, she was nominated for a Nobel fucking Peace Prize. Why. Why do you not vote for the people who deserve it? Dick Gordon’s not in the top 12. Neither is Enrile. I guess you can say that the Filipinos are getting people who are a representation of them. Even though what they need is a representative.
Third: Erap. Need I say more? Didn’t we impeach him in the first place for a reason?
So yeah, long story short: I did not vote. I just stayed here in my condo in Pasig while I mourned for my country. There is no more reason to vote if our country does not care for itself. I’d rather just be the President of The Rochester.
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New York

I’ve always wondered where my condo got its name: The Rochester. Rochester, New York is a city with the least expensive real estate in New York. It’s known for its livability for families and its perfect society for raising a family. Its economy is also great as it’s basically the New York, New York‘s little brother. It’s known as the Flower City. Sounds great, right? Loving it here so far.

Knight Mares

Once while I was sleeping in my condo in Pasig, I woke up in the middle of the night in a sweat. I was in the middle of my bed, alone in my room, alone in the dark. Why am I writing about this? Because I just remembered it and I just freaked the hell out. Well, it didn’t end out bad, though.

Scenario: I was in the middle of the forest. Medieval times. It was like I was caught in the middle of a war. I was wearing leather armor, and for some reason, I was a guy – muscles, mustache, beard, and all. Of course I knew that it was a nightmare, but I was stuck. I didn’t know how to get out of it.

The first thing I remember was running. I was cutting through the bushes and leaves with my huge-ass sword. I’m pretty sure it was as heavy as me, but I had no problem with carrying it. I was riding a beautiful black stallion, with his mane so finely brushed and he just looked majestic. As my steed galloped (whose name was Internet, for the strangest of God-knows-why), arrows whizzed by me. Arrows  were trying to hit me. People were shooting at me. And the arrows… were on fire. It was horrific. Everything behind me was on fire.

A little bit further, I saw a village… or at least it looked like a group of people living in hideous cobblestone houses. (I don’t think you can call them villages.) The arrows stopped for a moment, and I was able to command Internet to go faster, in my deep and manly voice. When I reached the stone-age houses, I searched for shelter. I got off Internet and ran for one of the houses. That’s where I met the Doctor.

The Doctor (I watch Doctor Who) was apparently the psychic-witch doctor in the town. I asked him of help, and all he said was, “Your horse is not who she seems to be.” I was confused, and I answered, “But Internet is my trusty steed. He will never betray me.” All he replied was, “Loyalty is not of the question here.” Seconds later, screams were heard outside, and I saw my enemies approaching.

As soon as I stepped out of the house, I was shot in my shoulder. I winced in pain, and fell to the ground. I looked around me: I was surrounded. Men in black balaclavas, black sweaters, and black pants. They looked like ninja-thieves. The last thing I remember was thinking, “Balaclavas look stupid,” before I slipped out of the world.

When I came to, I felt softness beneath me. Cotton softness. My body is being moved, and I can feel the ground move beneath me. I open my eyes, and I come face-to-face with a cow. I was in a farm. On a sheep. When I stood up, a man approached me, saying, “Your horse does not like being called a ‘he.'”

I woke up in a confusion. I reached for my bedside table, only to realize that it was on the other side of my bed. I had just moved in to my Pasig condo. Probably it was just that – a new bed, new house, new condo, new everything. It took me time to adjust in my new condo, but I have such friendly neighbors here in the Rochester. It really makes me feel good. Anyway, I’m digressing. Back to the story: it took me awhile to realize what the witch doctor meant. My horse was gay. And I was a Knight Mare. My subconscious is twisted like taht sometimes.

Movie Review: The Parent Trap (1998)

Flashback: late 90’s. I’m lying down on the couch, facing the television – chin on palms, feet up, and all. Lindsay Lohan and Lindsay Lohan are on the screen, 90s split screen effects applied. Dennis Quaid and Natasha Richardson (R.I.P.) are caught in a boat together by two 12 year olds. The Parent Trap was my childhood movie, and it will forever be my childhood movie.

Now, I’m lying down in my condo in Pasig. Once again, chin on palms, feet up, and all. This time, I’m staring at my laptop screen, watching my old VCD copy of The Parent Trap. It feels amazing to be a kid again.

Nostalgia aside, The Parent Trap is one movie that I will never get tired of. From the childish antics and Rube Goldberg devices, every single scene never makes me bored. The plot is about a pair of twins that have been separated at birth to L.A. and London because of their parents’ divorce. Eventually, they meet in a camp and decide to switch places. They eventually plan a way for their parents to meet again, but there is a large pothole in their plan: their dad is engaged to his hot blonde publicist, but he doesn’t realize it. When they meet, the girls successfully shoo away the evil gold digger, and reconcile with his ex-wife. And they all lived happily ever after.

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ReacQuaidtance.

Lindsay Lohan’s performances here as the British Annie James, and the American Hallie Parker were amazing. She pulled it off so well and even though there were times that felt like the editing was choppy, Lohan was able to show the scene as if her doppelganger was there with her. Also, accents.

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Twin Magic.

Dennis Quaid and Natasha Richardson did spectacular performances as the twins’ parents. They made a great couple, and their chemistry with Lohan was perfect for their roles.

This photo wasn’t the only thing that split up.

Elaine Hendrix’s egotistical portrayal of the evil gold digger was also brilliant. Her selfish and arrogant portrayal made me loathe her as a kid. Lisa Ann Walter and Simon Kunz play as the nanny of the American family and the butler of the British family, respectively. They were the comedy reliefs and played it to the bone. They were especially hilarious after they met and fell in love.

Butler love.

Butler love.

Overall, The Parent Trap is rated A for Awesome. Truly my childhood movie.

I seem to feel a lot of nostalgia recently in my Pasig condo. I just can’t help it I guess. I’ve just moved into the Rochester not so long ago. I can say that it feels just like home, just without parents and add a hundred percent of freedom!